Pieces of Me

I don't really seem blog very often do I? Seeing as now it is Dec 10. Hahah...well I am going to start to write again. I have started to miss just putting my thoughts down. I also started a new Journal aswell.
Well what's new. I am still working at TD Waterhouse....which is a blessing that I have kept my job this long. Hahha...it's so true. Not much else is new other than that, work does seem to take up alot of my life. I've gone to alot of movies lately. I suggest seeing "The Last Samurai" it is really good. I definitely recommend to everyone. I had a nice visit with my bro. He came down on Monday and we went to my dad's house and then put up some decorations outside. It looks really good but I think that it needs some colour. The only light we had were those icicle lights. Then after that we dropped off a christmas tree to my mom's and waited to decorate that until the next day. So then after work on Tuesday I came home to my mom's house and we started decorating the tree. I never realized that the majority of the time you spend decorating the tree is taken up by just the putting up of the lights. I think it was last year that we had bought one of the nets of lights that you drape your tree with. Well we had our tree completely decorated after like 30mins. It was great. Then we spent the rest of the night playing Scrabble and ate pizza. Mmm..pizza.....I'm getting hungry.
I'm starting to get scared....the year is almost over. Which means that I am running out of time to figure out what exactly I am going to do with my life. I still pretty much have no idea what I am going to do. Although I have a few ideas I don't know that if what I am thinking is really what I should be doing. I don't know. It just sucks not knowing where you are going and having no direction. I do kinda miss school, I know that it is really wierd but I do admit that I like to learn. But with learning it means doing the work and I am about the worst procrastinator in the world. I truely believe that. Well I am sure that I will figure it out. Anyways. Like I said earlier I am hungry and I am going to and eat something. Later Skaters!

New....what is new? Well, I have been working tons and trying to fit in all those other fun things in life. I haven't been really good lately with keeping up with people. I am sorry about that, I know that it can be pretty frustrating. Umm...well work is going really good. I am one of the top performers so far, and we've been there for about a month so far. I was talking with my Team Manager and she said that she was really proud of my results so far. Umm...yeah I really like it there.
Umm....not much else is really new, I am going to go and try and sign up for a gym membership, probably at the YMCA so that I will actually go, since it is about 10 minutes away from work so I will just go after work. Um. Not much else to say right now, which I can say is pretty pathetic seeing as I haven't made an entry on here for like a month. Wow! That's great! lol...well I guess I'll talk to you kiddies later!

Hi everyone,

I know it has been a while since I last wrote in here. I have been pretty busy for the past while. I started the training at TD Waterhouse USA. It went really well but was totally overwhelming. I like the people there too....there are very nice and everyone gets along really well. I am excited about the job cause it doesn't seem like it is too hard. Which is always good, but the thing about it is that you get really tired talking all the time. I've found that when I go on my break, all I want is silence. I love not talking. Yesterday was our first day of being on the call floor. I was soo nervous my first time I was on the phone but after taking a few calls I was good. Then today I was taking calls all day and I was doing very well. I have to continue that for another week and then we go back to training for advanced customer service. Right now all we are doing is just giving customers quotes and resetting their passwords. And if we are comfortable enough then we can help them with other problems but those of us who are not then we just transfer them to another department. Well I guess that is pretty much all to say about that. I am liking it alot, but I don't like how much money is getting taken off for taxes. Now I finally know what everyone is bitching about! LOL!! Well I guess that is it for now. Later kids!

Do you ever get the feeling that you could just write forever. I kinda feel that way right now, but I don't know what I want to write exactly. I've never been good at writing. Sure I could always get by, but I personally don't feel that I have written anything that is either riviting, or at least interesting. It doesn't make the reader want to read more. Well, I guess that is only true to an extent because you all are reading my entries, so that would mean that you want to continue reading what I have put down. But other than here, anything else that I have writting, what I have said is true. I have such strong feelings about so many things and I just don't have the capacity to be able to express those feelings. And when I try to it doesn't come out how I want it to sound. Or it lacks the feelings that I truely feel. Enough of this babbling. I will just talk about normal things. Things of relevance to my life.
I had said in my last blog that I went to Kitchener, well I guess I'll elaborate on my visit there. I left London on the Friday of last week. Chris' parents picked both Chris and I up from his house at around 8:00. From there we went out for dinner, but before driving half way across town, they turn around to go back to Chris' house because I had forgotten my wallet. How much of an ass did I feel like. They insisted that it wasn't a big deal, but really I know that it probably irritated them. Then we went to Kelsey's for dinner, which was pretty good, except that the seated we got was at the booths. Let me tell you now, DON'T EVER TAKE A BOOTH SEAT WHEN YOU GO TO KELSEY'S!!!! Those seats are slanted and it feels like you are leaning towards your food. It's really uncomfortable. Anyway, then from there we went to Kitchener. Sat, I made an appointment to get my hair cut, and I went and got it cut at a salon called Bilalo. Cool salon, weird owner. lol...but a nice guy. Then after that pretty much just chilled at Chris' parents. Then on Sunday, bummed around the house, then went to my sister Rebecca's house for dinner, which was very cool. Then we went and rented a movie and watched that with my sister. By that time it was pretty late and Rebecca didn't want to wake up the kids to drive us home, so she lent me her truck and I was to bring it back to her place the next day. Chris and I drove around looking for something to do that night but couldn't find anything to do so we just went home. Then Sunday, I took Rebecca's car back to her house, she took Chris and I to Gloss (Gloss is a clothing store that my sister owns for those of you who don't know) Then she drove us back to Chris' then we went back to london after eating dinner. That was pretty much my

Just to let everyone know, I am still alive. I am back from Kitchener, which was tons of fun. It was great to get to relax and hang out with Chris and his family. I also went and saw my sister Rebecca and had dinner there. Um...that is pretty much all for now. I am staying at my mom's house now, so if anyone needs to get a hold of me that is where I am for now.
Later

Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse.
I found out that for sure my granfather has cancer. It's cancer of the esophogus. I don't know the full details but it's pretty bad. He's getting either a CT Scan and it will let him know if the cancer is spreading. My sister was talking to someone that knows about it and says that he probably has either 3 weeks to 3 months left. My granpa isn't even that old. He's in his 60's I think, doesn't smoke, barely drinks. I don't get it! I feel sorry for my mom too, she's had it rough (as we all have). In the past 3 years, My aunt died of cancer, my cousin died of SIDS (sudden infant death syndrome), my second cousin was murdered, my grandfathers girlfriend died of cancer, and then my granmother died of alzheimers. It's just too much. I'm drained of any tears that might have been left in me. I can't cry anymore, not because I don't want to, but because it's just not physically possible. But, who knows, I might surprise my self. I don't konw what to do.
Along with all that there is a battle for our family home between some slut and my father. The fact that I am trying to decide whether or not I am going to move out of my dad's house. My brother deciding whether or not he is going to return to school, or home. I don't think that it is helping with my dad's situation. A week ago, while in conversation with my sister Jen, he said that he was glad that for the moment I was staying with my sister. I think that he knows that if I was there, that he would be venting on me all the time. I'm not there so I can't say whether or not it is Karen who is getting all the grief, but I am just glad that it isn't me or my brother or my sister for once. And after all the shit that she stirred up between my dad and I, I am kinda happy that she is getting the brunt of it.
With September coming closer and closer, I am becoming more scared. I am becoming more and more aware of the fact that I have no future planned out, while all my friends from High School are entering University. Some of them I didn't even get to say goodbye to because they are going away for school. Sometimes I think that I have been a bad friend. But other times I remember when I was being a good friend, I was still not treated very well. I don't know really how to explain it. But all I know is that I am going to miss out on a really great experience. If and when I do experience it, I will have to do it on my own, since all of my friends would have done it already.
I have an interview on Monday for a job with TD Canada Trust. I am a bit scared because this is the first time that I have actually tried to get a "real" job. Not something that pays like minimum wage, and I am selling some clothes or little nic nacs. And I acutually have a chance at moving up if I really show them that I am capable.
On a happier note, I just got back from an exciting weekend in Brantford. I went with my friend Melinda (who is originally from there) for a wedding. I didn't know the people, they were friends of Melinda's. On the friday we went to the reception hall as soon as we got into Brantford. There we helped with setting the tables. And Melinda and I decorated a trellis that was to stand behing the head table. It was beautiful afterwards. Everyone kept telling us how wonderful it was. Then after that we taught everyone how to fold napkins so that they sit in the wine glasses and the top of the napkins fanned out. It looked really cool. After that we went to Melinda's parents house and we sat outside and tanned for a bit. Then we had some dinner. Then hung around for a while then we went to Melinda's sisters house and I dyed Melinda's hair, then went to bed. The next day we got up and I had bought a shirt for the wedding the day before. And while in the store I didn't try on the shirt, only because the man who was helping us seemed so sure of the sizes. But when I tried it on the next day, nope it didn't fit. So before the wedding service I had to run over to the shirt store again and find one that actually fit. That was the dilemma in the morning. Then after the service we went to Melinda's grandparents house. Played a game of cards, while waiting for the reception to begin. The wedding was over at 2:00 and the reception didn't start until 6:00. So we had some time to kill. So we went to the reception hall, and when we stepped into the room there was a live polish band. (I forgot to mention that this was a polish wedding). Bacially it was a ton a food, great music, and lots of booze. The night was great, I had so much fun! I can't wait for the next polish wedding. Today we woke up kinda late, and didn't get out the door to come back to london until 1:00. And now I am back. So that was my weekend. Pretty great. Well that is pretty much the update since I last wrote in here. Till later! Au Revoir...

Today wasn't too bad, it was nice and quiet. I didn't have anything to stir me up you know? The weather was perfect, there wasn't any humidity, well at least not like the past few weeks.
I went and saw my friend Melinda today, which was nice, cause I hadn't seen her in a while. I miss her, but I know that she is busy and so am I. But it was nice to sit down and get to talk about the small stuff. She has been really worried for the past like 2 months about this wedding that we are going to together. Which I am so excited about because I get to meet so much of her family. It just will bring her and I that much more closer. But yah, so I pretty much just showed up at her house, which I felt really bad about, cause I know that I really should have called before, but I didn't have a quarter or anything. So, I buzzed her and she was surprised to hear it was me. But I know that I wasn't waking her up or something like that cause I knew she had to work at like 4 and I showed up at like 2:30. So yeah, she told me about her trip that she took out to the east coast. I was supposed to go with her and a bunch of other people, but I couldn't go because I am not able to book time off work, and I didn't have the funds for it. But I am glad that she had fun anyways! LOL. Cause we all know that she wouldn't if I wasn't there. lol...just kidding. So, I got to see pictures, which was definitely fun. We got caught up in conversation, and the next thing we knew, Melinda had to be at work in like 45 minutes, and she was about to miss her bus. So we walked down to the Market so that she could get some money out and take a cab to work. Umm..then I came back to my sisters house and Ari and I talked about his trip and stuff. Then I bummed around. Then we decided that we would go for dinner together. It was cool for him and I just to go out by ourselves and hangout. So yeah, we went down to Barney's which was cool. We had a few beers and I had a burger. It was definitely good times. Then I came back to my sisters house, and then I was going to sit down to watch a movie but I decided that I would come on here and type about my day. So that concludes my day.
Oh, and yesterday I had a bat attack. It's the story of Jeff, the bat and the cat! lol. Anyways, until later! Ciao